From the Pen of Charles DeMarr

The Miracle in Moscow

2011-01-17T07:36:00.000-08:00

There were many critical events that happened in the 1980's that paved the way for the eventual end of the Cold War in 1991. Some of these events were quite literal, while others were more symbolic. No one will ever forget Ronald Reagan's immortal words spoken in Berlin in 1987, "Mr. Gorbachev, Tear down this wall!" Likewise, the images of the 1980 United States hockey team pulling off the stunning upset of the Soviets are permanently ingrained in the memories of everyone who witnessed the feat.

It has now been over 25 years since another epic sporting event helped bring an end to communism in the former Soviet Union. I am speaking of the larger than life boxing match between American heavy weight champion Rocky Balboa and the Russian challenger, Ivan Drago.

The Miracle in Moscow is still one of the most memorable boxing matches of all time. Both fighters entered the match coming from completely different situations. Balboa hadn't fought anyone in three years since a stunning third round KO of then champion Clubber Lang. Despite this large gap between fights, he still was a veteran of 78 matches, sporting a record of 56-22. Drago, on the other hand, was relatively unknown and just months removed from a shocking victory over former champion Apollo Creed, in which Creed suffered fatal injuries from the powerful punches of Drago.

Drago was immediately recognized as a villain in the United States after Creed's death, especially with his callous remarks following the fight, saying of Creed, "If he dies, he dies." In addition to this there were wide spread rumors of Drago using anabolic steroids, which were later substantiated in 1998.

For fear of his safety, Drago's camp was insistent the fight take place in Moscow, instead of the United States. "They call him a killer. He is a professional fighter, not a killer," said Drago's wife, Ludmilla. "We are getting death threats. We are not involved in politics. All I want is for my husband to be safe, and to be treated fairly."

Nicoli Koloff, who served as Drago's business manager until 1988, was especially critical of the U.S. government and wanted no part of another fight in America. He accused the American government of trying to slander Drago's reputation. "We fight in Soviet Union or we fight nowhere," he said at a promotional press conference for the match. "It's all lies and false propaganda to support this antagonistic and violent government."

Not only was Balboa 45 pounds lighter than Drago, but he also surrendered seven inches of height to the daunting Russian. Many were surprised when Balboa had agreed to the fight, saying it was suicide, that he couldn't win. "I was concerned because we had seen him," said Adrian Balboa, Rocky's wife. "We knew how strong he was."

Drago was unquestionably a juggernaut. Anyone who witnessed the fight against Creed had to be impressed by Ivan's astonishing strength. "Whatever he hits, he destroys," Koloff remarked on Drago's punches.

Balboa himself knew he faced an up hill battle. "No, maybe I can't win," he said before the fight. "Maybe the only thing I can do is just take everything he's got. But to beat me he's gonna have to kill me, and to kill me he's gonna have to stand in front of me and be willing to die himself. I don't know if he's ready to do that."

To say the atmosphere in Moscow was hostile to begin the fight would have been a huge understatement. Balboa was serenaded to a steady chorus of boos from the angry Soviet crowd as he entered the arena. It was as if they finally had the opportunity to release 40 years of pent up frustration on America, all on the shoulders of one man.

The first round of the match went exactly as everyone expected. Drago landed heavy bombs on Balboa, who's wobbly legs didn't look like they would last three rounds. But in the second round Drago received an unexpected cut over his eye thanks to a hook from Balboa. "I was pretty excited about that," Balboa's trainer Tony "Duke" Evers would later say. "I told him he's not a machine. He's a man! He's a man!"

Even though Drago controlled much of the fight, it was clear Balboa was not going to go down easily. Over the course of the 15 round match the gritty American took the best punches the dominant Soviet could throw at him. "He's not human," remarked Drago. "He's like a piece of iron."

Perhaps more astonishing than Balboa lasting through the entire fight, was the reception he was receiving. Towards the latter end of the match, the venom from the Soviet crowd was turning into applauds. Everyone in the arena was inspired by the heart showed by the determined Balboa.

Still, Balboa entered the last round well behind in points and needed an improbable knock out to come out victorious. About half way through the round it was clear to everyone Rocky was going to do the impossible. After sustaining a series of blows Drago finally hit the canvas, unable to get up. Balboa had won.

The inspiring battle now complete, Balboa's post game remarks to the crowd stirred everyone, both Soviet and American alike: "During this fight, I've seen a lot of changing, in the way you feel about me, and in the way I feel about you. I guess what I am trying to say is, if I can change, and you can change, everybody can change!"

The fighters went their separate ways after the match. Drago fell into relative obscurity, only making news again after evidence of his steroids scandal surfaced in the late '90's. Balboa went into retirement after he sustained brain damage from the blows dealt to him over a lustrous career in pugilism. Later he briefly managed eventual heavy weight champ, Tommy Gunn, until their relationship soured in 1990. He followed that up with a return to the ring in 2006 only to be defeated by Mason Dixon.

The dream Balboa had in 1985 of change slowly took place. Four years later the Berlin Wall fell, two years after that communism and the Soviet Union collapsed. Balboa's assistance in ending the Cold War is certainly understated, but as evidenced by history, it also cannot be denied.

I Want You to Make Some Friends This Summer....Lots of Them!

2009-09-26T06:27:00.000-07:00

Social networking. It seems like overnight this radical new sensation has popped its head into all of our lives. Whether it be through Facebook, Twitter, or Myspace chances are you or someone you know is hooked on social networking. Ok, so I was kidding about Myspace. Who on earth uses Myspace?

Social Networking has truly revolutionized the way people interact with each other. Pretty soon things like email and calling friends on the telephone will be a thing of the past. Who needs to do something so personal when you can just look up their information on Facebook? Or you can just get a twitter message sent to your phone. That way you can know that Joe is at the grocery store buying milk and you won't even have to hear about Sue and the kids.

Someone recently told me they were Facebook holdouts until they were told Facebook is like People magazine, except with people you know. Sign me up! One of my favorite features about facebook is how it says right on your page how many friends you have. Someone found a way to stay popular when they got out of high school. "I am so much cooler than you because I have 459 friends and you only have 221." Nevermind that most of those friends are people they will never talk to again. It is all about the social status attached with the number.

It is for that reason you can never turn down a friend request. Just the other day a girl I have never met in my life requested me to be a friend. I thought to myself, "Sure, why not? Who could say no to a friend?" I clicked the accept button and I had just made a new "friend". The thought never entered my mind that this person would actually want to interact with me. A few hours later I had a note posted to my wall that read, "Charles, you are one hunk of a man. Here is my email address....Kiss."

Now, I would like to consider myself a fairly open person. I am not opposed to making new friends. However, when someone tries to get me to show p.d.a. on the internet they have crossed the line! Fortunately, on Facebook you have the option of removing such posts from your wall, which i quickly did. I mean, I don't want all of my friends thinking I am kissing people I don't even know.

When I told this story to my Mom*, she responded, "Well, why did you accept her friend request?" I was flabbergasted. Say no to a friend request? Was she out of her mind? Perhaps she doesn't realize we are in the age when saying no to a friend isn't an option. Not when everyone in the world can see how many friends you have.

I mean, I hadn't said no to someone wanting to be my friend since...Oh, that was a dark day. I still think about it often. I was back in high school then. Those were the days when bowl cuts were cool and Chumbawumba was still Tubthumping the night away.

In my high school there was two possible times during the day when you were assigned to eat lunch. They brilliantly labeled them as first and second lunch. My friend Nick and I were the only ones of our group of friends who had first lunch. One day, Nick was in line getting food at Taco Bell while I waited at the table with the lunch my Mom made me. Just when I was about to bite into a delicious peanut butter sandwich I was approached by two kids. They asked me if they could sit by me. I remember thinking to myself, "They think I am sitting here all by myself because I am a loser and I don't have any friends!" I didn't know how to react. I didn't really want to sit with them, but how do you get out of the situation? Well, I'll tell you how. You say no. That's what I did. They both had an astonished look on their faces as if they had reached an all time low. I mean, to be rejected by someone with apparently no friends is very degrading... And before you start judging me, I felt really bad about saying no. It was just a knee jerk reaction. If I could do it all over again I would let them sit with me.

Those days have long since passed, though. Now you don't have the luxury of saying no to someone who wants to be your friend. It's a dog eat dog world and if you don't have enough friends on Facebook to back you up, you will sooner or later get eaten.

*Yes, the great Charles DeMarr still talks to his mom.

An Ode to Bourbon

2009-04-22T09:29:00.000-07:00

Every so often an invention or idea is presented to mankind that changes the way society functions. These things don't come along often, but when they do their impacts are undeniable.

Imagine what life was like prior to the 1440's when Gutenberg invented the printing press. The masses were largely uneducated and the transfer of information was extremely time consuming.

Think about growing up before Alexander Graham Bell invented the first practical telephone. How revolutionary it must have been to be able to talk to someone in a different town as if they were in the same room.

Recently another creation of that magnitude has come to the forefront of humanity. Of course I am talking about the Kentucky Bourbon Burger from Carl's Jr. If you have yet to experience this wondrous feast, you simply must do so.

Never before has a fast food establishment created something so delicious. It has moved Carl's Jr. ahead of McDonald's, Burger King, and dare I say even Wendy's in the realm of the fast food empire.

I will never forget my first experience trying the Kentucky Bourbon Burger. I had seen several of the commercials. Despite Carl's Jr's less than appealing advertising I thought it would be worth trying. I had grossly underestimated what I was getting into. My first couple of bites were filled with uncertainty. The taste was so unique I wasn't sure how to respond. A few more bites and I was starting to understand it's brilliance. Finally, after I had swallowed the last bite I knew I had just eaten a masterpiece.

Sadly, one of the things separating the Kentucky Bourbon Burger from some of these other innovations is it will only be available to us for a limited time. What would it have been like if Philo T. Farnsworth had finished working on the television and never did anything with it. I can picture someone asking him if he was going to try to get the television distributed to mass audiences and him replying, "Nah, it's not that cool. Now who wants to go bowling?"

Nevertheless, the demise of the Kentucky Bourbon Burger seems to be unavoidable. I have spent the past few weeks preparing for my season of discontent much like a squirrel prepares for winter by gathering acorns. I can't even tell you how many times I have checked my mailbox hoping to get coupons from Carl's Jr. only to reach in and find disappointment. Yet, I continue to eat there, because if the winter is inevitable I must be ready when it hits. For when the Kentucky Bourbon Burger leaves Carl's Jr. for good, so do I.

Bucks Aquire Eliason in Fan Swap

2009-02-10T17:27:00.000-08:00

Logan, Utah- The Milwaukee Bucks acquired longtime Utah Jazz fan Kendell Eliason Tuesday in exchange for Bucks fan Peter Robert Casey and future considerations.

Eliason had been a Jazz fan since 1993 and was part of the fan base during the team's only two NBA Finals appearances in 1997 and 1998. He also spent time as a Phoenix Suns fan.

The Jazz had been shopping Eliason for the past month after the team's general manager, Kevin O'Conner, had announced the team's intention to rebuild the fan base for the future.

"We feel this is a move that will help us build for tomorrow," O'Conner said. "Obviously we are sad to see Kendell go, but ultimately it was time for both of us to move in different directions."

O'Conner said the Jazz will release Casey, who was included in the deal to make salaries match up.

"The bottom line is we didn't think we could afford to keep Kendell with us for what he was asking," O'Conner said. "He wanted his cake and he wanted to eat it too."

Eliason made no secret about his desire to remain with the Jazz. He said he will be leaving a lot of fond memories of being a Jazz fan behind.

"I have had some great times cheering for Utah and I would have loved to have been a Jazz fan for life," Eliason said. "I guess it wasn't meant to work out that way though."

The Bucks hope Eliason will provide them with the fan experience to reach the Eastern Conference playoffs this spring.

"I think I have the opportunity to be part of something special with Milwaukee," Eliason said. "Anytime you have guys like Andrew Bogut and Richard Jefferson on a team there is going to be a reason for me to cheer."

The Brave One

2008-09-12T11:04:00.000-07:00

I just wanted to send a special shout out to my roommate Brave Kendell, for today is his birthing day. It should be noted how Kendell was the world's first Atlanta Braves baseball supporter. Back in the day the Braves were a terrible franchise. They had Dale Murphy, and not a whole lot else. People used to mock Kendell for supporting such a pathetic team. He was the only one who dared to cheer for them. That is why they call him Brave Kendell. Plus, he is also very good at killing spiders. Thank you Brave Kendell for all that you do. Especially for your braveness.

A quick side note, Brave Kendell happens to be really good friends with Dryden Mitchell, the lead singer for the group Alien Ant Farm, and also the channel 5 weather man. Sometimes they like to go to the mall together. They also love going to the movies. It is quite the special thing. Happy birthday Brave Kendell!!!

There is no such thing as a free lunch

2008-08-31T18:51:00.000-07:00

Sometime ago, I went on an ambitious adventure with a very good friend of mine, Major Undeclared. While we were roommates attending Utah Valley State College we were told legendary stories from our friend Bourne.

Bourne's grandfather, Lamar, lived some 90 miles north in Logan. According to Bourne, Lamar was a bit of an eccentric. Among his odd behaviors were painting his driveway purple and driving from his home to Layton, Utah everyday to meet up with his twin brother, DeArr, for lunch at the Golden Corral. In fact, we were told if we were if we were to ever drop in Lamar's home around midday he would most certainly take us their for lunch.

A few years later Major and myself found ourselves attending Utah State University, not too far from Lamar's house. Now I will have you know neither one of us is particularly fond of the Golden Corral. Let's be honest here, it's not the greatest food in the world. That said, my first rule is never turn down a free lunch, plus I have to admit few things appeal to me as much as being able to eat as much as I want until I am full.

One day Major and I were particularly hungry. I know many of you are thinking it is pretty low to hit up an old man for a free lunch. Especially since neither one of us had ever met him in our lives. You have to look at it from our point of view though, and that is we were HUNGRY! Not to mention we were college students. Of course we were going to try it!

I will never forget when we parked our car in the church parking lot near his house. A strange feeling of anxiety overcame both of us. Perhaps it was a tinge of guilt. Rather, it could have been not exactly knowing what to say to an old man who had no idea who either of us was. Bourne told us many times he would just invite us straight in, but we were still a bit skeptical. Finally, we got up the courage to knock. Slowly the door answered and there stood Lamar with a bewildered look on his face. We told him we knew Bourne and he smiled and invited us right in.

We went in to find a typical home of a senior citizen. He had pictures of his family all around the room and a collection of some of his art work he had produced throughout the course of his life. He seemed like a nice man, perhaps a little eccentric, but then again aren't we all? He told us all about his boyhood adventures he would share with DeArr. It was easy to see the similarities between the two of them and me and Major. I wondered if he had ever randomly visited a friend's grandfather to try and get a free lunch.

After 45 minutes it became apparent to the both of us that we weren't going to get a free lunch. But that didn't matter, we both kind of felt like we had done a good thing in spending some time with a lonely old man. Then on our way out the door he said, "Next time you stop by I will take you guys to lunch!"

Wow! Our efforts could have actually brought some fruit. "What do you think," Major asked. "Do we go back?" Of course we both knew we had to do it. We had to finish our quest. It wasn't going to be easy, the first visit had taken a lot out of both of us.

A few weeks later we made our return visit to Lamar's. Again, we sat on his couch and listened to his war stories for another 45 minutes. It was becoming very obvious we weren't going to get our lunch. We even began dropping some very shameless hints that it was getting close to lunch time and we were getting hungry.

Finally we gave up our dream. We were both pretty devastated. What more could we have done? Needless to say we were none too thrilled with Bourne. In a matter of two weeks we had visited his grandfather more times than Bourne had in five years and had a lot less lunch to show for it.

Some years later we finally found ourselves eating lunch at the Golden Corral, but this was on our own accord. It was the only way we could put the situation behind us. And to be honest, I have never had a more therapeutic meal in my entire life. It probably won't be the last time either. I am sure the day will soon come when me and Major meet up every day to eat lunch there. After all, it seems to be part of the great circle of life.

From Henceforth you Shall be Known as Darth Bombay

2008-07-19T08:48:00.000-07:00

From time to time I like to reflect on some of the paramount moments of my early childhood. It seems whenever I do this a certain movie is often pushed to the forefront of my memories. I am certain it is a film that has touched the lives of all those who have seen it. Of course I am referring to the Mighty Ducks. Even as you, the reader, examine these words you are thinking of the feelings you experienced the first time you witnessed the "flying v".

But what really made this motion picture so epic? I don't think anyone could argue it is because of the development of one of the truly great hero/villains in cinematic history. Gordon Bombay is a twisted wreck of a human being who finds peace in teaching children how to fly.

At first, he is someone who turns to career success and alcohol to compensate for the lack of love in his life. Even when Gordon is at his absolute lowest point it is easy to see that there is still good in him. The thing that makes him so powerful is his ability to overcome his demons and still teach some underprivileged children the meaning of teamwork and a sense of accomplishment.

The question of what made Gordon stray forever lingers in my mind. How could a child who was deemed the chosen one of Minnesota Pee-Wee hockey turn to the dark side of life? Disney provides snippets of background to this fabulous story, but so much more could be developed. A prequel to the Mighty Ducks is a necessary step to allow all of Gordon's fans the peace they deserve in knowing his illustrious tale.

I urge the kind people at Walt Disney to consider this potential masterpiece. The Mighty Ducks: Episode I, the Phantom Mallard could be a budding success. Mine is not a lone voice, for there is a group continuously garnering support for this brilliant idea. Please seek out this group, for it has the means of changing the world. If your desires are pure go to this link: http://www.facebook.com/home.php?#/group.php?gid=22674410879

Let your voice be heard! Quack! Quack! Quack!

The Story of the Gender-Confused Cat

2008-06-11T17:46:00.000-07:00

I would like to tell you all about my sister's cat, Milo. Milo is not your typical orange tabby cat. Milo has severe gender identity issues that stem back to its days as a kitten. You see, when my two sisters talked my Mom into letting them get Milo they did so on the pet store's word that Milo was a boy. My Mom didn't want them to get a girl cat because she didn't want to get it fixed and she didn't want to deal with it having kittens. "Oh sure, this one's a boy," the pet store associate told my sister. "See, you can tell."

The problem is not everyone in this world is aware of what makes a cat a boy and what makes a cat a girl. Turns out Milo is a girl. They were all able to conceal it from my Mom for the first two years. Then mysteriously Milo became pregnant. My sisters used the same explanation that Jeff Goldblum used in Jurassic Park for the dinosaurs reproducing in the wild. "Well, he used to be a boy Mom!" they told her. "It's just nature's way of saying life will find a way!"

As you can imagine, Milo has suffered through a very confusing life. To make matters worse, Milo was a terrible mother. She allowed her first batch of kittens to be eaten by a dog. Well, maybe she didn't allow it, but it did happen. Milo still freaks out whenever she hears the sound of a baby kitten. Part from the trauma of losing a litter, part from the trauma of having a litter when you aren't supposed to.

This isn't the only ordeal Milo has been through. A few years later my Mom decided she needed to get Milo fixed. She took Milo into the vet to get the procedure taken care of only to discover Milo had already been fixed. Turns out our crazy neighbor didn't agree with a boy cat having kittens. She did the only thing she thought would stop the problem. She took Milo to the vet and had her fixed...and didn't tell anyone about it! So Milo has been fixed twice...and counting!

My sisters think Milo is great. Milo doesn't know what to think. They will take pictures of Milo with a ribbon and a bow and then turn around and take a picture of her with a necktie on. My brother and I have long been in support of giving Milo the recognition she deserves. She deserves to be recognized as a girl. I am sure all of you who have read this tale would agree. After all, it can be very confusing to have a name that suggests you are one gender when you are really another. We came up with the solution to re-name the cat Beverly, in tribute to the great author Beverly Cleary. If Beverly Cleary doesn't scream feminine, I don't know what does. Unfortunately, our pleas have gone on deaf ears and the cat remains known as Milo. A sad story for a sad creature.

2008 NBA Finals

2008-06-04T18:54:00.000-07:00

The 2008 NBA Finals are finally upon us. Tomorrow night the most anticipated finals match-up in 2o years starts when the Boston Celtics host the Los Angeles Lakers in game 1 of the best-of-seven series.

Let me preface this by saying I am a die hard Celtics fan and as such I am more excited than just about anyone that they are finally playing for a championship again. That said, I am surprised at how little respect they are getting from the national media. I am willing to admit I may have my fan goggles on. Perhaps I am overlooking their weaknesses and/or the Lakers strengths. However, they did win 66 regular season games, including a stellar 25-5 mark against the superior Western Conference. True, they struggled mightily in their first two series against the Atlanta Hawks and Cleveland Cavaliers and many of their weaknesses were made glaringly evident, such as their inability to defend teams that are good in transition. Still, I think they were starting to get back to form in the Eastern Conference Finals against the Detroit Pistons. I was relieved they were able to get two road wins, and was especially impressed with their series clinching victory in game 6.

The Lakers ran through the West, and this coupled with the fact they have the league's best player have made them media darlings. It is hard to argue with the success of both the team and Kobe Bryant as an individual. He is finally proving he has what it takes to make his teammates around him better players. The Lakers offense is unbelievable. Their mid-season addition of Pau Gasol had made them nearly impossible to defend. If anyone is up to the task it is the Celtics, who led the NBA in most of the league's defensive categories during the season.

This series is exciting not just for the history of the rivalry, but also the intrigue of the potential match ups. I think one of the biggest keys to the Celtics being able to win is their two wingmen, Paul Pierce and Ray Allen. Bryant will most likely guard one of the two and the other needs to step up big time. If the Lakers use Bryant to guard Rajon Rondo and allow him to roam, as has been suggested, both players as well as Rondo need to make them pay. The Celtics will also have their hands full trying to decide whether they want Kevin Garnett to guard Gasol or Lamar Odom.

I am picking the Celtics to win the series in six games. Call it a homer pick if you'd like, but I think the one thing that seems to be getting neglected in all of the series hype is that historically the best defensive team always beats the best offensive team. I think this will be the case in this series. Look for the Celtics to be able to control the tempo for the most part and limit Kobe Bryant's productivity.

To all of my fans

2008-06-04T16:06:00.000-07:00

It is high time that I, Charles DeMarr, enter the illustrious world of blogging. Over the past few years I have met numerous people who have been impressed with some of my work reviewing music on itunes. They will come up to me on the street and say things like, "Hey Charles, we really appreciate what you do on itunes. You'd make a great blogger." Or maybe, "Charles, if you had a blog I don't think I would read anything else." Such high praise, and it is to these fans I dedicate this blog. It is truly an honor to be recognized by so many people everywhere I go. It is a stark contrast to my humble beginnings as a young blacksmith growing up in Sheboygan, Wisconsin. It is true I have my critics as well, like the one person who referred to me as "stupid" for my accusations of Disney remaking Bambi when they made the Lion King. Or the individual who said my criticism of Mario Lanza was sophomoric. I invite such naysayers to leave now. You know who you are. If you can't handle the world of Charles DeMarr this site is not for you.